When my twin babies were Legitimate Home Business - Personal Profile Assessment For a Home Based Business born, I made a sound commitment that they would enjoy the benefits of being a singleton, just like my firstborn. However, this was much easier said than done. Well-meaning relatives decided it would be cute to give my daughters identical outfits, identical bibs, and identical stuffed animals. With my relentless assistance, they are now 30-year-old individuals with their own tastes in attire, friends, and activities. It wasn’t easy, but over those years, I formulated guidelines to help my girls feel valued for their unique personalities.
Rule #1 – Always call them by their given names. After they were born, my friends and How 5 Simple Steps Will Grow Your Events & Functions Bigger And Better Each Time. relatives spread that word that I had “twins.†With my first child, everyone spread the word that I had a daughter and used her Handicapping Software Horse Racing Tips! name. But when my two babies were born, they became part of a matched set. When anyone asked to hold one of my girls, I made sure she knew which baby she held.
Rule #2 – Dress each baby in a different way. That well-meaning relative who brought identical clothes was probably dismayed to find only one of my children in the outfits she had given to each of them. Still, I needed to clarify that I was raising two individuals who just happened to be born on the same day and who were coincidentally carrying the same genetic New Tools and Technology For Laptop Diagnostics and Repair code. As tempting as it was to see two identical girls in identical pink dresses, I needed to force myself to explain that had they been born two years apart, they wouldn’t have had identical outfits.
Rule #3 - Allow each child to select which hobbies to pursue. It was difficult for some folks to understand why one girl wanted to take piano classes while the other wanted to learn flute. My friends would question, “Isn’t that a lot of work driving them around to different places?†I’d reply, “No more work than getting three children of different ages to different sports, music, ballet, or art classes.â€
Rule #4 – Let Following a Diagnosis, A Patient Advocate Can Help Lead the Way them form their own friendships. Just because one girl was friends with the next-door-neighbor’s child didn’t mean that my other daughter would also find her enjoyable. Over the years, each child accumulated a variety of friends. My declaration for their TWINdependence also caused carpool issues. Occasionally, I’d find myself as the carpool drop-off for one daughter and pickup for the other. Occasionally this actually worked to my benefit especially when you tossed my older daughter’s obligations into the mix. Other parents felt sorry for me as I drove three young ladies around town. I just smiled and accepted their pity, knowing that at least I cared enough to take my daughters where they needed to be, as opposed to some parents who always seemed to place their children into my car without jumping into the pool.
Rule #5 – Give them unique presents for birthdays and holidays. Again, the well-meaning relatives Roads Of Rome: New Generation managed to sneak Roads Of Rome: New Generation in identical gifts under the premise that they wouldn’t argue over the gift that way. OK, I could appreciate that logic, but to also get them the same greeting card? When was the last time two unique children fought over getting the same birthday card?
Rule #6 – Plan separate birthday celebrations. I know this looks like more work for you, and it probably is. But think of it this way – you’d be doing the extra effort anyway, if they hadn’t been twins and were born during different months. Since I had encouraged my daughters to develop their own friendships, the guest list became simple. It also lessened the burden on other parents who may otherwise have had to purchase two birthday presents (and they would doubtless be identical Why you Need to Hire WordPress Developers for WordPress Customization toys, as well!)
I held the birthday parties on different weekends, alternating who got the party first each year. They Dirty Talking Recommendations - Spice Up Your Like Life With Dirty Discuss got to pick their own birthday party theme, their own cake decoration, their own party location, and their own games. Naturally, they were invited to each other’s birthday party. They even got to choose a particular present to give during the party. What better way to establish individuality than to hold separate birthday parties!
Rule #7 – Look very carefully for indications of dominant twin syndrome. By the time my daughters were in 8th grade, one had become the dominant twin with the Roads Of Rome: New Generation other tagging along. Despite my best efforts, their normal dependence on each other developed into a relationship where one of my daughters had difficulty making her own decisions. From my viewpoint as a parent, this was not a favorable characteristic, just as she was entering the high school influence of drugs, alcohol, and sex. She needed guidance beyond what I could give her.
So we enrolled her in an Adironcack camp minus her sister. When we picked up the camper, I could quickly see that her self-confidence had been given the strength that I felt she needed. She loaded her own gear back into the car instead of looking around to see if anyone would do it for her, and she chattered all the way home about her experiences in the woods. Looking back on that week now as an adult, she tells me, “It was the best thing you ever did to help me find my own personality.â€
That camping trip might have been the best thing, but it surely wasn’t the only factor. My three girls are strong, confident women who coped beautifully through the pressures of high school Roads Of Rome: New Generation and college. And they have a strong sense of social justice, probably because they learned early that every person is Roads Of Rome: New Generation an individual, even if they do appear exactly alike.
Renee Heiss is a freelance author of books, articles, and blogs for teachers, parents, and everyone who helps children. Renee Heiss is the mother of twin girls who are now 30 years old and their singleton sister who is 34. She learned that helping her daughters achieve independence is important for developing stong decision-making skills. Find out more information at her blog: http://parent-teacher-child-connection.blogspot.com/ And her website: http://www.reneeheiss.com She is a retired child development teacher and the author of Feng Shui for the Classroom, Somebody Cares!, and Helping Kids Help.